:: where is my bed of roses ::
i dare say i'm quite a positive person. no matter how bad things get in my life, i cry over it and pick up myself quickly after tt. after all, it's your own choice to be happy or sad and either way, the world will continue to revolve whether u like it or not. so y not choose to be happy?? if u think abt it, happiness realli is a choice, your choice.
so dun blame anyone if u r unhappy or upset abt anything. it's all in your mentality. it's all up to u how u wanna deal with it. if u stay happy most of e time, chances r, u will truly b happy. if u whine and lament abt ur life day in and day out, not only will u bcome a bitter person, ppl ard u might start to shun u and realli, who can u blame?
lately, i've been wrongly accused of someone's unhappiness. it is clear tt this person chooses to live in misery and yet e person blames me for it. i dun understand y i hafta b held responsible for e person's sufferings, it's so unfair. worst of all, e person's accusations r on baseless grounds. and it is apparent to me tt e situation is not as bad as e person made it out to be. argh. well, it's not gg to affect me. i am staying happy. =)
suddenly in e mood for apologies. feel like i owe quite a many of u apologies. 1stly, sorry 2 my baby dear.. i kno i've thrown some unreasonable tantrums lately.. i am truly sorry abt it.. something's up with me and i can't quite put my finger on it. u've been so tolerant with me and i realli thank you 4 tt. *muacks* 2ndly, sorry 2 my frens for leaving them out of my life. well, i understand u guys realli care 4 me but.. some things will take a bit of time b4 they can b revealed 2 u.. so.. i'm sorry but i promise i will make it up 2 u guys. *hugs* 3rdly, wanna say sorry 2 my mom.. i kno u r having a hard time but it isn't easy for all of us either. sorry tt u haf to go thru all e things u had to.. i want to help, realli.. i promise things will get better for us.. ok? *smiles* lastly, sorry 2 e anonymous.. i hope u didn't think i was leading u on cuz tt's e last of my intentions. i realli hope u'll b able to get on with ur life doing all e things tt makes u happy. being e positive person u r, i kno u will. all e best..!
there's so much in this world for us to b thankful for.. we shud live each day like it's our last.. positive or negative statement, up to u to decide. cheers, everyone!
:: relationships are hard ::
i am a lucky girl. i haf 3 guys in my life who genuinely care for me. but i only have one heart and so i can only commit to one. i do not like all of these 3 guys at the same but at different points of my life and so all of them have a special place in my heart (they differ in size tho). the biggest share (which may well b about 99%, if u hav to calculate) of cuz belongs to my one and only. the remaining 1% has got 2 split between the 2 guys. which i have not had a real relationship with. let's call them A & B. but then u kno, a drop of black ink can dilute a pot of clear water, cause small ripples and probably some slight reactions.. so it does some things to my emotional well-being sometimes. especially when i think of A.. i wud say, he was my 1st love. (sorry 4 e mushiness) so u kno, hard 2 get over and done with cuz flashbacks come 2 my mind ALL THE TIME when i'm reminded of him. as for B.. hmm.. he is like this guy i wish i had a relationship with but nv had.. and i will alwaes b wondering abt "how it will b if..", "wat wud happen if we.." and so on. u kno, things like tt.
for now, i am absolutely in bliss with my bf.. and i haf no intentions of changing anything. but well, i can't stop my mind from gg where it wants to go sometimes. and lately, it has been been realli hard to control. but i kno for sure wat i want and i kno i'm gonna make it happen. after all, i dun wanna hurt anyone and especially not the one i truly love. wat can i say, relationships r hard. realli.
:: chicken soup for the "kid" in you ::
been such a drag to come to sch and it is not becuz of the sch work but e ppl. as most of u probably kno by now, i am staying one more sem becuz i've incomplete modules so technically, all my course mates have graduated (mostly) except for a few of us (actually a handful la) who are sharing the same "interest" in sch. so, as i was saying, it is these ppl whom i see day in and day out in sch tt r driving me nuts (disclaimer: not all of u, u kno who i am referring to. if u dun, er.. read on). some of them r so immature it makes me feel disgusted. and the worse thing is tt some of them r so caught up with being "popular" and "happening" tt they forget the basic things in life. tact, individualism, privacy and most of all, consideration. it irks me each time one of these "kids" take their seat bside me and start 2 blabber abt their so-called life. like i'm interested. i realli haf got better things to think abt other than who is wearing wat today, who's got thicker make-up on, so-and-so's got a new gucci wallet and oh, someone's newly single! is everything so shallow to these Gen-Y ppl? (ahem, i belong to Gen-X, and am proudly one, thank you. at least we have got more values.)
i mean while it is perfectly fine to b keeping up with fashion, one has to make sure one does not lose oneself in it. u shud b wearing the fashion and not letting the trend wear on you. sometimes being the majority does not mean it's the best. u haf to be able to look out of the box and not stay trapped in there. look at the ppl ard u and look thru their masks and wat they're wearing on their bodies and wat they're saying thru their mouths/body language. if u can do this then maybe u will have a tiny idea on wat i'm trying to say. the end.
