:: My Drama-Rama Mind ::

:: me VS myself ::

today, i am going to b bold. i am going to embark on a topic which i may not kno how to begin, how to proceed, nor might i kno how to end. nevertheless, i need to talk abt it in the best way i possibly can.

someone has said that i haf higher expectations of other ppl than i do for myself. i am aware of tt, i am not offended. cuz most of the time, majority of the ppl R like tt, no? u say wat others shud b doing, instead of wat they haf done, how they shud haf done it in stead of wat has oredi been done. basically it's a lot of talk and no work done. i.e, it is also called bragging. i am guilty of tt but i do not think it is wrong. pls allow me to explain myself.

1st of all, r we saying unless we haf been thru the same exact situation given the same circumstances, then only r we allowed to make comments abt wat happened? then wat abt freedom of speech? (o i'm sorry, we're in SG) even so, why can't i b myself and say wat i wanna? i mean, i am comfortable with being myself, so y shud i watch wat i say?

on the other hand, for the consideration of other ppl, for some reason they may not be happy with ur comments. so then we shud b moderate and general with our comments and not make it too personal? but we all kno who we're talking abt, rite? so wat is the problem now..??

omg, i am so confused by my own raging thots tt dun seem to be settling anytime yet. shud i change myself jus to suit the other person? issit fair for both of us if i had to lie abt something jus to keep the peace between us? is tt realli wat human chemistry is? compromising and lying?

i am totally lost now cuz i dun seem to kno myself anymore. i dun say the things i wanna say, i dun show my true emotions anymore. i can't b myself anymore.

is this part of growing up? or am i being caught in a difficult situation and tt i cannot see it?

is this realli love?

i am so disillusioned.. i dun think i shud b thinking abt this any longer. i jus wan my peace and comfy lil shell back.

where has it gone?

posted by Mrs. Lee @ 12:57 PM