:: My Drama-Rama Mind ::

:: too sensitive for my own good ::

i can't believe my IPP passed jus like tt. 11 weeks! *vroom!* i am now officially a staff of Banyan Tree, no longer under attachment! looking forward to payday wud b a better feeling now. :)

i think i'm too sensitive for my own good. but i can't help it if i am so receptive towards the things ard me.. rite? it's like a natural instinct to catch a child if u see him/her falling. i can't stop myself from feeling e things i do.

my bf thinks it's becuz i am too sensitive, tt's y "things" r happening. but in my POV, i think it's e other way around.. it's bcuz things r happening, tt's y i am so sensitive towards e issue.. in this case, his mother. i jus can't stop thinking tt one day he might choose his mother over me. even tho i haf no intentions to make him choose. it's jus e thot tt is scary & refuses to stop haunting me. & any small little thing tt triggers off this thot can realli make me go crazy. & i think it is also driving my bf crazy. he is sick & tired of me behaving this way & i kno it. but i dunno how to tell him tt i dun wan this either. i jus cannot help it. obviously i wud like to haf everyone living harmoniously tgt but from e way i see things, i think tt can only happen if i bear with the things tt i normally cannot tolerate. & i dun see how tt is gg to make me happy. especially since i dun get e assurance tt my husband will b on my side irregardless of any situation.

i still think it is bcuz of this insecurity tt's y i am being so sensitive. how cud it b tt i am being sensitive tt's y i m insecure? i am realli gg mad trying to figure this out. will it get better if i stop gg over to his plc?? if i dun see him & his mother so close tt they tell each other everything (unlike us)? if i dun try i dunno, so maybe i shud.

posted by Mrs. Lee @ 10:27 AM