:: My Drama-Rama Mind ::

:: i hate my life ::

haf been in a foul mood since after lunch yesterday. i think my new job is not doing my morale any good. o ya, think i forgot to mention tt i clinched THAT job.

1st of all, there was absolutely no training/induction. not even orientation. no briefing on company background/products/services watsoeva. not exactly a very welcoming feeling.

then, boss tells me exactly wat he wans. w/o giving me any information! so i haf to work things out all by myself with no one to guide me watsoeva.

honestly, i am ok with tt. after all, i am a very independent worker. but u hafta allow me some reasonable frame of time to settle in & familiarise with the business and its culture b4 i can present u with solutions eh?? wat does the boss think i am, some genius? if i were such a marketing guru i wud not b working for a measly company such as this!

i am so glad i did not get duped into the 1 yr contract & tt i can still get out of it. but now i am totally confused. i dunno wat i wanna do anymore. i alwaes thot i was into marketing.. but apparently marketing is a huge sector & i am not interested in all of marketing (particularly not wat i'm doing now).

i was happy at my previous employment cuz, to begin with, i had colleagues (yes i dun haf any colleagues currently, it's jus me & my boss!). 2ndly, i had a very very good mentor. i picked things up real easily & considerably quick. 3rdly, i was told specifically wat i had to do & was given clear objectives. lastly, my boss was very encouraging & gave me lots of time to settle in b4 he started me off with assignments.

it's the total opposite here & i realli hate it. so much tt after lunch yday, i job-hunted again. not knowing wat i wanted to do specifically. i browsed & randomly applied for jobs. last night i got a call from one of those which i applied to & they scheduled for an interview this afternoon.

i dunno whether i shud b doing such rash things. after all i'm only 1 week into my current employment.. shud i give it more time to wait & see or go with my instincts?? i dun wanna b such a quitter but.. I AM REALLI HATING IT HERE (especially the fact tt it is a 5-and-a-half-day week! my fridays & saturdays are absolutely burned!). maybe i am not as independent as i thot, not as resourceful as i thot, & not as clever as i thot.. this indeed sucks.

i am frustrated at myself, yet i dunno y. i feel so lost. & i am venting it on everyone ard me. lately i haf been very disgusted with the way i spend money. my bf has called it stupid. i am upset at tt comment but i can't say i disagree.

wat makes it worse is tt, i am broke. again. when can i finally get tt full pay & earn my own my keep & start tt long overdue savings account??? WHEN?!

i hate my life.

posted by Mrs. Lee @ 12:03 PM